One of the happiest days of our lives was when we tied the knot, committing to share our lives together. For my husband and me, who were poor Ph.D. students, it was a simple yet joyous occasion celebrated with our families and friends.
The day before our wedding, my friends and I transformed the cozy chapel next to USC's main campus, adorning it with traditional Chinese red ribbons and flowers we had prepared. We focused our modest budget on the banquet, a pre-wedding photoshoot, and a donation to the church. The red envelopes we received from our relatives helped significantly to offset the costs of the event, which was wonderful.
Getting married is a big milestone—exciting, emotional, and likely stressful as the big day approaches. It marks the beginning of a new chapter in life, and like many significant events, it often comes with a hefty price tag as well.
So, let's delve into some key topics I believe couples should think about when preparing to tie the knot.
Wedding Budget #1: Create a Budget and Stick to It
Regardless if you are a saver or a spender, a wedding is such a big event that a splurge on this day is not just reasonable, but expected.
In 2025, the average wedding cost in San Diego sits around $37,000 - $50,000+, which is certainly a substantial sum for most of us. So it is crucial for the new couple to set a realistic budget right from the start. The last thing anyone wants is to kick off their new life together under a mountain of debt. Take the time to have an open discussion about your finances, even if it feels a bit uncomfortable. Working together to establish a mutually accepted budget can serve as a valuable practice for building a strong foundation of communication and compromise as a couple.
Wedding Budget #2: Identify your priorities and allocate your funds accordingly
After setting your budget, it is time to figure out how to allocate the funds—wedding venue, photography and video, decorations, attire, entertainment, etc. It’s essential to focus on what truly matters to you as a couple, rather than being swayed by friends and family (unless they’re footing the bill!). And if this exercise started to push your budget limits, re-evaluate, as it is likely your budget limit can balloon overtime if you cave in to each nice-to-haves along the way.
Remember, you’ll be the ones living with those financial choices for years and decades to come. It’s a good practice to weighing alternatives especially in areas where you can compromise, so you can stay in your original budget.
Wedding Budget #3: Research, compare, and find your balance
Next up, explore your options and don’t hesitate to negotiate with the vendors you’re genuinely considering. Having a coordinator on your side can be beneficial. And if you are getting help from friends and family, set clear boundaries can keep the process more enjoyable and less stressful. A good tip here is to focus on what truly matters to you for the big-ticket items, and let some of the smaller details slide!
Wedding Tip #4: Enjoy your special day
Your priority on your wedding day is to enjoy it. You’ve put so much work and heart into the planning; now, let others take care of you, and enjoy every second of your celebration.
Budget #5: Plan a harmonies life together beyond the special day
Couples often ask whether they should maintain separate bank accounts or open a joint one. Personally, I think the choice isn't some reflection of your love or commitment to each other—rather, it's more about what makes most sense for your financial situation and your individual styles. My husband and I decided to keep our own accounts, which gave us the freedom to manage our own expenses in ways we each value, while sharing costs for housing and utilities. Fast forward 30 some years later, we still have our accounts, though added each other’s name for legal conveniences.
In summary, as you prepare for your wedding, it’s a good idea to reflect and ask yourselves some key questions:
- What’s your budget for this special occasion?
- Which elements of the wedding matters most with you?
- How would you like to manage your expectations and finances, as a couple, for this special day and beyond?
Marriage is a huge commitment, and your wedding should be one of the most joyful events in your life. Take the time to discuss your visions and make choices that reflect your shared goals and preferences. If needed, seek advice from your trusted friends, family, and professionals, as they may have insights that can help you evaluate your options and make decisions that suit your needs.
Ultimately, this moment is just the beginning of your journey together. My wish is that you will use this opportunity to start building a long, happy, and prosperous life together.
Li Tian is a financial advisor offering securities and advisory services through LPL Financial, member FINRA/SIPC. The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.
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